Most people know they should probably pray more. The problem is that a lot of us aren't sure how. You close your eyes, and your mind goes blank. Or you start out fine, and a minute later you run out of things to say.
Maybe the only prayers you remember sounded like a speech, full of "thee" and "thou." Or maybe you haven't prayed in years, and you wonder if God even wants to hear from you.
He does. The good news is you do not need a PhD to pray! Jesus showed us how, and He even gave us a prayer to follow.
Back in 2024, I preached at Arroyo on how to pray like Jesus, from Mark 1. The video opens with a look at how Jesus Himself prayed.
Make room to pray, like Jesus did.
As news about Jesus spread, crowds came to hear Him and to be healed (Luke 5:15). Even so, "Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed" (Luke 5:16, NIV).
Notice the word "often." Prayer was part of the regular rhythm of Jesus' life.
The book of Mark shows what that looked like. One evening, the whole town gathered at the door, and Jesus healed many who were sick (Mark 1:32-34). Here is what He did next: "Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed" (Mark 1:35, NIV). Then He went on to preach in the nearby villages (Mark 1:36-39). Jesus prayed in between the busyness.
Maybe you're thinking, "You don't know my schedule." Are you busier than Jesus? No. So your schedule is not the real issue. The real issue is whether prayer matters as much to you as it did to Him.
If you do not learn to take a break, your soul will break.
Picture yourself flying down 580, or whatever freeway you drive, at 80 miles an hour. Brake lights flash up ahead, you hit your brakes, and nothing happens. That ends in a wreck, and so does a life with no brakes.
Taking a break doesn't mean binge-watching a show for five hours. Your soul needs time with God. For you, getting away might start with switching your phone to do not disturb.
You don't have to start with an hour. Start with five to ten minutes. Find a spot where no one will interrupt you, and spend that time with God.
Jesus gave you a simple guide for what to say.
So what do you say? If you aren't sure, you are in good company. One of Jesus' own disciples asked Him, "Lord, teach us to pray" (Luke 11:1, NIV). The prayer Jesus taught is the one we call the Lord's Prayer.
Many people know it by heart, which makes it easy to rush through. So read it slowly, as if for the first time:
"This, then, is how you should pray: 'Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us today our daily bread. And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.'" (Matthew 6:9-13, NIV)
Notice how Jesus begins: "This, then, is how you should pray." He did not say, "Recite these exact words and add nothing of your own." You can pray it word for word. But Jesus gave it to you as a guide.
Think about it like this. A template helps you make something you would have a hard time making on your own. The Lord's Prayer is a template for prayer. Each line is a section you fill in with what is going on in your life.
Start by talking to God as your Father.
The prayer does not start with what to ask for. It starts with who you are talking to, because that shapes the whole conversation: "Our Father in heaven."
Jesus didn't say "Our King" or even "Our Creator," though God is both. He said "Father." That word is personal and powerful at the same time. He is in charge of everything, and He wants you close.
So you don't have to pray like you're writing a letter to someone in the 1930s. You also don't need to swing so far the other way that you forget who you're talking to. Just talk to Him as your Father.
Next comes "hallowed be your name." Hallowed is connected to the word holy, which means set apart, on a whole other level. So how can a holy God be your Father? Jesus. He came looking for you. He carried your sins to the cross and defeated death when He rose again. Put your faith in Him, and God welcomes you into His family. That is a free gift, not something you earn.
Maybe prayer has felt like talking to a wall, and you have started to wonder if prayer really works at all. Your Father hears you. Some days, all you can pray is one word: help. That still counts. One psalm even begins, "Help, Lord" (Psalm 12:1, NIV).
Fill in the rest of the prayer with your own life.
"Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven." Heaven is where God's will is done perfectly. Earth is not heaven, and a lot is broken here. Notice that the first lines are about God's name and God's plans, before you ask Him for anything. So ask for His plans in your own life first. Bring Him the thing you are worried about and say, "I don't know how this will turn out, but I want what You want." Then write down one to three names of people who don't know Jesus yet. Pray for them by name every day, and leave the rest to God. Only He can open a heart.
"Give us today our daily bread." In Jesus' day, bread was what people needed every day to survive. This line invites you to depend on God for your daily needs. Your needs, not your greeds! Are you living self-reliant or Father-reliant?
"And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors." Your sins are like a debt you could never pay back. You may pray this line most often, because all of us mess up often. Own up to what you have done, and God will forgive your debt, because Jesus already paid it. Then ask Him to help you forgive others: "God, I can't forgive this person on my own. Would You help me?"
"And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one." Temptation is the tug to go in the wrong direction, and you will feel it every day. So pray before it comes. Not praying before you are tempted is like running a marathon without training for it. Then pray in the moment: "God, lead me not into temptation. Deliver me from the evil one."
Let God speak first, and stay on the line.
If you are still stuck for words, let God speak to you first. Open the Bible, God's word, and read a little. Then talk back to Him about what you read. Reading and praying go together.
You don't even have to start the conversation. God already has. He has already pursued you and loved you, so prayer is simply your response.
And when you say "amen," don't hang up. Amen is not a hang-up button. It means "let it be so." Your few minutes alone with God can become a conversation that goes with you all day. He is always with you, and He is always ready to listen.
This matters for more than just you. Right after Jesus prayed, He went out and poured His life into others. Being with God comes before doing things for God. As Jesus said, "apart from me you can do nothing" (John 15:5, NIV). You cannot give from an empty cup. When you spend time with God, He fills you with His love so you can pour it out to the people around you.
Today, you can stop waiting until you know what to say and simply start talking to your Father.
Daily Practice: Pray through the Lord's Prayer line by line, in your own words. Read one line, then tell God what that line means for you today. When you reach "your kingdom come," pray for the people on your list by name.